Catch some Zs. Get some shuteye. Hit the hay. Call it a night. Get your beauty sleep. We have no shortage of colorful ways to say, “Go to bed.”

Sleep is not just a luxury. It is how our bodies and brains recharge. Without enough of it, things can get weird in a hurry. According to Healthline, prolonged sleep deprivation can lead to hallucinations, cognitive impairment, irritability, paranoia, delusions and even psychosis. The longest recorded stretch without sleep is about 264 hours, or just over 11 days. That sounds like a college finals week mixed with a newborn baby and a home remodeling project.

Most of us would admit we could use more sleep. The question is, how much? For years, we have been told the magic number is eight hours a night. As a teenager, that seemed easy enough. At my age, getting eight uninterrupted hours feels about as realistic as dunking a basketball.

Some sleep researchers say the answer is not as simple as one-size-fits-all. The Guardian explored common health myths and noted that sleep needs vary from person to person. Some highly productive people, including former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher, reportedly functioned on as little as four hours a night. New parents everywhere are reading that and wondering where they can sign up.

Before you decide to set your alarm four hours earlier, there is a catch. The same Guardian article cited a 2017 study showing that people who regularly slept seven to eight hours performed better on cognitive tests than those who slept more or less, regardless of age.

Fine. Sleep more. Message received. The bigger challenge is figuring out how.

The American Cancer Society offers several suggestions. Go to bed at the same time every night, even on weekends. Clearly, whoever wrote that has never watched “just one more episode” on Netflix.

The organization also recommends avoiding naps after 3 p.m. and keeping naps less than 20 minutes. That sounds reasonable unless you have ever stretched out on the couch during a Sunday afternoon Vikings game. Those naps have a way of turning into accidental hibernation.

Experts also recommend keeping your bedroom dark, quiet and comfortably cool. On that point, I am all in.

Perhaps the toughest advice is turning off televisions, phones and other screens at least an hour before bedtime. I know they are right. I also know my phone seems to become twice as interesting the moment I decide it is time to sleep.

If you have discovered the secret to drifting off quickly and staying asleep, I would love to hear it. Until then, I will keep counting sheep, avoiding late-night scrolling and hoping that tonight is finally the night I earn all eight hours.

Have a terrific Tuesday, and thanks for reading.

Shane Goodman
Editor and Publisher
Times Vedette digital newsletter
shane@gctimesnews.com
641-332-2707